Monday, September 6, 2010

New Friends

I used to think I had a hard time making friends but I don't really think that's the case. I'm picky. I like people who are moms, who have lives that are just as crazy as mine, and who don't really have time to spend on their friends. That's what makes it difficult. The last woman I met whom I liked, works a full time job, has two little girls, goes to school part time, and is married to a man that is a full time student. Wow. And I thought I was busy.

Rob met her husband a year ago. They became friends at school and wanted to get the two families together. I balked. I don't like meeting new people; it's awkward and a lot of the time, the other families we've met are too different or... out of our league? He tried to arrange a picnic last summer, a barbecue, a day at the lake - he was relentless. I said no. I was under a lot of pressure with my senior capstone, finishing up my degree, surviving a job that I can't stand, my oldest son was graduating and starting his own life. I made all the excuses I could think of.

At the beginning of this summer, my husband started talking about getting together with this other family again. This time he said he wasn't taking no for an answer. I finally (and literally) threw up my hands and said, "Fine, lets plan to meet them at the lake and barbecue." I picked the date and he made all the plans. My job was to show up. And I did. And I really enjoyed myself. It took a little while for the ice to break, and when it did, this amazing woman and I sat talking about everything and nothing for hours. Our kids played and fished, husbands talked and talked (and fished a little), and this woman and I talked - endlessly. I was sad when the day came to an end. I was also exhausted and burned and dragging a complaining 11 year-old home.

I had enjoyed myself so much that day, I told my husband that we had to do it again - soon! We went to the New West Fest, spending the day walking around, feeding our kids 'fair food' and listening to the free concerts. This year the Fest had margaritas at their Brewfest section, so when we were done walking around and doing everything, we sent out kids with our husbands to ride all the crazy, expensive rides, and the moms? Well, we bought margaritas, picked out a spot on the grass and talked for as much time as we could get. I really liked her. We decided to exchange phone numbers and befriended each other on Facebook.

I've talked to her on the phone twice now; always after her kids are in bed and mine are on their way. I can relate to her because she's raising a family, working and surviving school - not just surviving but excelling. It's nice to venture out of your comfort zone sometimes. You don't always meet people you can enjoy at soccer practices or the bleachers at football games. Sometimes it's good to let your husband set you up with someone - you never know what the rewards will be.

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